Cultural and Social Impact of Migration

Two weeks ago, I received an alert on my phone during an afternoon planning period. With a tap of my finger and a face recognition scan, an email from my eight-year-old son’s homeroom teacher appeared on the screen. The message I read was short and direct. As curtain keywords propelled off the screen, the words cascaded toward an abrasive halt. The message included the statement that my child no longer wanted to attend school. My mind began to wander as I tapped on the corner of my desk, attempting to determine my next course of action. Minutes later, my wife messaged me asking if I could talk to the specialist teacher with which my son had an issue in his class. Without hesitation, I replied, unsure how the conversation would unfold, mainly because the teacher I needed to talk to was in my department. The school bell chimed, echoing the signal of the end of the current period. The unkempt metal door to the shed, which we call an office, opened. I lifted in my chair, attempting to appear unfazed by any events of the day. My co-worker sat down parallel to me in his usual stance. I briefly observed his body language to see if I noticed any discomfort from sitting across from me. He quickly nodded his head over his computer screen before gazing at it. At that moment, I spoke, “so, did anything happen during my son’s class with your earlier”? He warmly shared an incident in which my son missed a winning point during a game, leading to an argument with other children. My co-worker then ended with the statement, “kids will be kids .” His glance following the announcement suggested he wanted a reply, but I could not give him one at the moment. My co-worker had no idea that my son deals with comments from the same children he argued with. Regularly I listen to stories about how the children in his class don’t say nice things to him and how he wishes he could go to a different school. While I understand my son’s plight, I also remember similar situations at other schools. My son is reaching for a sense of belonging, but what does that mean for him? In the article Where do I belong? Ruth Druart describes Third Culture Kids “as growing up in different countries but not being integral parts of these countries” (Shenfield, 2017). I remember once in a “family debriefing,” where we sat down and talked about the day’s events. I asked my son who are you? His response involved being a soccer player and the color of his skin. If I am honest, they are the only external qualities that have remained consistent in his life outside our family structure. Having experienced international and bilingual schools, my oldest son adapts quickly to new situations. It is easy for him to let things go, but he holds on to intangible memories when he can. An example is how he equates living in the United States to fishing trips with his grandfather and life in the United Arab Emirates to a trip to Lego Land. As stated in Harrington’s article, “immigrant children seek to manage their various cultures and identities” (Harrington, 2008). My son wants to be all his experiences but struggles to put them into words. Last year’s first month of school, he struggled to tell his Chinese teacher his nationality. As she asked detailed questions, her original perception became dwarfed by the multicultural reality of my then seven-year-old. As my son grows, I have come to the understanding that my reality is not his reality. The pains of my youth were more systematic, while his battles are social. As a parent, my responsibility is to love and assist my child with learning how to interact with others and respond to adverse situations. He is not a boy from America, the Middle East, or China. He is all of the above, and his perception of himself should be based only on the identity he chooses to accept. Resources Harrington, P. (2008). The negotiation of identity in an international school setting. International School Journal, 28 (1), p 12-16. Shenfield, T. (2017, May 17). Understanding the challenges faced by immigrant children. Advanced Psychology Services. https://www.psy-ed.com/wpblog/challenges-faced-by-immigrant-children/